What do I look for in love… I made some pretty poor decisions on dating prior to meeting my wife. While it was not the most enjoyable experience, I got to learn exactly what I was looking for in my spouse. My stubbornness comes out very often and I usually need to learn stuff the hard way. I’ve joked that my last year of going through cancer and amputation was God knocking me upside the head with a 2×4 since I didn’t get all of the other clues He tried to use.
She, on the other hand, is WAY smarter than I am and knows what she wants. (Well… except for when it comes to supper…) She is strong willed which is what is needed to be able to put up with me. I’m stubborn. And that may be putting it mildly. While that can be a good thing in some cases, it is not in most. (Might be why we have a three year old going on 18 in our house right now!! The saying “threenager” certainly applies.)
She has to have a sense of humor. I tend to have a dry and often sarcastic sense of humor and it can be hard to read at times. If she didn’t have a good sense of humor, there could be big trouble in little Harrisburg! As you can tell from the picture, she does have a sense of humor and she also puts up with mine, as well as my families, well. And it isn’t just putting up with it, she dishes it out just as good as anyone!!
I hate doctors offices and anything to do with the medical field. I knew nothing about medicine and did everything I could to avoid going to the doctor. The “man cold” is a real thing for me so I had to be with someone that is caring and patient. What profession exemplifies that better than nursing. When you get married you vow to love each other in sickness and in health. Boy did that line come true. I knew I needed someone caring but I never could have guessed just how important that would become.
On top of all of that, and maybe a little selfishly, I knew she had to be gorgeous. I don’t like the saying that looks fade. To me, she is more beautiful now than the day we met.
Most importantly, she had to have a relationship with God. My faith is important to me and I knew that I wanted… no needed… someone who felt the same. We actually met on christianmingle.com and while you can’t always count on that alone ensuring the person really does believe, I felt it was my best shot. Let me tell you… that $30ish dollars for the membership has turned into the most expensive membership but most fulfilling investment I have had to date.
All of this isn’t just a one time thing though. Love isn’t something that you just happens and then stays the same. It is constantly evolving and something that has to be worked on. While what I look for is the same, the ways that I look for it may change at times. Instead of someone that would make me soup, it turned into someone who sat by my hospital bed every day for months. Instead of someone who put up with my neverending hobbies (even though that still exists), it was someone who pushed me to get up and walk with PT when all I wanted to do was lay in bed. I know that things will again change, but the overall WHAT I look for and what attracts me in love, will always stay the same.